By Joe Torosian
“I said one of them goes around with a black mustache.”—Captain
“So do I, if I had my choice I’d go around with a little blonde.”—Groucho
Right off the Top: I would have posted a column yesterday, but I developed a blister on my thumb. It made pressing the space bar on the keyboard absolutely excruciating.
I’d like to see NFL teams bring back the split-backfield. Boobie Clark & Essex Johnson…McCutcheon & Bertelsen…
Question: Are spring passing tourneys about getting better? Getting a sense of another teams talent?…Or…Recruiting talent?
I was asked how I feel about women broadcasting major sporting events like football, basketball and baseball.
“Have you heard Jessica Mendoza?” I answered. “She might be the best thing going at ESPN these days…Remember Jeanne “Go Go” Zelasko? She was great.”
“Do you have any problem with it?”
“My problem is the same with anyone in a position of responsibility. You shouldn’t get a pass if you suck. If a female broadcaster sucks, she shouldn’t get a pass because she’s a woman. President Obama should not have been given a pass because he was black. Lavar Ball shouldn’t be given a pass because his son loves him…And Jared Goff shouldn’t be given a pass because he was drafted number one overall.”
That’s what I said…And then I was “Unfriended.”
Up front—because I know some jackwagon is going to accuse me of being heartless—I am sorry for anyone—player/non-player—suffering with health issues. Outside of someone in the medical field, my day job exposes me far more than the average person to people going through serious medical issues.
Now for the, “but…”
…I’m having a hard time with Hall of Famer/former Miami Dolphins middle linebacker, Nick Buoniconti’s anger with the NFL and his claims the league is just waiting for him and older players to die.
Buoniconti is 76 years old. He played his last NFL game in 1976. He’s a lawyer. He worked for years as host of Inside the NFL on HBO…This guy’s post-NFL career has been among the most productive of anybody from his era, and now at a time in life when things start to break down, it’s football’s fault?
Of course, Sports Illustrated…is happy to help out.
He’s 76, and he’s been diagnosed with dementia. That is awful, but I’ve buried people who were in their 50’s and died of dementia, and they didn’t play football.
There’s no doubt NFL veterans from the 80’s, 70’s, and 60’s have been after-thoughts to the league…But they’ve also been after-thoughts to the players union when it comes to their care.
So you get angry people (including players families) together with ambulance chasing lawyers and self-important, sanctimonious, media outlets…and it becomes easy to take a report and exploit it to their benefit.
There’s obviously some truth to it; professional football has to take a toll. It’s been good that is has re-invigorated the teaching of the fundamentals of tackling at all levels (as opposed to just hitting)…But to declare it all conclusive is ridiculous.
…and then you add in that stupid, dumb-butt, fraudulent Will Smith movie on CTE…and, yeah, some of us become hesitant about the source of Buoniconti’s ailments…and sorry to say, suspicious of those driving the agenda.
Midbits (same as ‘Tidbits’)
Midbits: Has anyone considered giving Dodgers utility-guy Chris Taylor a urine test?
Midbits: Diana Taurasi is about to become the WNBA’s all-time leading scorer…On a similar note, I recently made a terrific bean & bacon soup.
Midbits: “I hope the Celtics take Lonzo.”—Aram Tolegian
Midbits: Do you think the Cubs are missing Dexter Fowler?
Midbits: Former San Marino running back, Benny Hung turns 25 today.
The Dude abides…
Contact Joe at firstname.lastname@example.org
Author of “Tangent Dreams: A High School Football Novel” & “The Dead Bug Tales” both available through amazon.com and Barnes & Noble
Follow Joe on Twitter @joet13b
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